It’s not easy to say goodbye

So after spending most of half term painfully homesick… And really trying to analyze why… I’ve come to the conclusion that nothing in my life feels terribly concrete right now.

I honestly feel like I’m living one good bye to the next. You’d think I’d cherish the time I do get to be reunited with friends but perhaps I’m not so positive as that. As soon as I go home for a visit, I’m thinking about having to say good bye again. It’s even worse in England because I have absolutely no intention of staying here permanently, or even that long, so all my relationships feel false. I’m scared to let people in, because I don’t want to be hurt by good byes.

I’m scared to go home too. I’m worried relationships and people will have changed. I know I’ve changed. Will my old friends still want me? Will they get annoyed when I say, “Let’s go to the cinema” the way some British people do when I say theatre? These things are not really big, life altering problems, but they are still uncomfortable.

I think that is where I’m at. Trying to shape my life when there is little directing it. Just measuring the time from one goodbye to the next, because what else is there really? The next goodbye is actually ages away, but even still, I can’t help being reminded every time I’m with my friends here… That it won’t last.

Anyway, Paris and now being very busy back at work has almost completely cured my immediate and aching homesickness (though I’ll always miss Canada a little). I’m going through a post homesickness episode phase though that I like to call ‘pride in the moment’. It’s when you listen to a lot of music that celebrates living recklessly in the moment, or sacrifices and goodbyes being worth it… and then also live like that.

Currently on repeat is “Save Tonight” by Eagle-eye cherry. Check it out- 90’s classic and something that describes a lot of moments I’ve had in the last year.

Other good ones:

Atlas hands- Benjamin Francis Leftwich
Against the grain – city and colour (Canadian)
Fake Empire- the national
Reminder – Mumford and Sons
Pelican – the Maccabees

I’ll stop there but there are tons. -Celebrating how I’m living my life… Something I’m going to start doing more of.

Paris pictures 2

Paris pictures

Stolen from my friend Dan.

Au revoir

We didn’t do quite as much on Sunday. Not very many things worth talking about. More pastries (I had two for breakfast today), lots of sights (famous bridges and statues) and the burial place of Napoleon.

To be honest we were knackered, cold, and ready to go home. Well I think Dan was ready to go to Paris Disneyland but we didn’t quite have time for that. We decided to walk to the train station, Gare du Nord to kill the time we had left. An endeavor to say the least since it was quite far and we were so tired and cold.

It ended up being a lovely walk after a bitter start. The wind couldn’t get us after we got off the big wide streets and into the winding, small streets. We saw some things along the way and arrived at the station with just enough time for one last Parisian meal.

I almost ordered Andouille- which is intestines. Well I wanted to try something new, but the look the waitress gave me made me chicken out and go for le poulet instead. Mussels are what came so I guess it didn’t matter what I ordered. We ate, dessert included, because my friend is a bad influence on me, and headed off for our train.

Thank you British border control, your ridiculous questions nearly made me miss my train. There is something romantic about running to catch a train in Paris though… Perhaps everything is just a little more romantic in Paris.

Some interesting things I noticed about Paris.
Their subway is incredibly cold. Even holding onto the hand rails inside the train was uncomfortable or impossible without gloves.
A lot of things are closed on Sunday.
If you ask someone if they speak English they will always say, “un petit peu” (a little bit) but then speak it very well, much better than my “petit peu de français”.
Their pastries are better, the best, just so far superior to… Everything else.
Things are more expensive than London (I barely believe it myself but I think it’s true!)
They have cute, tiny balconies in every window sill.
That’s all I can think of at the moment.

Pictures to follow if I ever get to it :). We actually took some pictures with cameras other than our iPhones, but not very many. We were just enjoying the moment.

Samedi à Paris

Pour cette poste, j’ai pensé que je voudrais écrire en français. But then I remembered that auto correct won’t fix my grammar in French.

Saturday, I woke up in the morning with pain in my legs. We had walked very far the day before and now I was going to pay for it. First thing first, obviously…. We needed to find some coffee and French pastries. Done and done. I had my favourite Pain au raisin and un café au lait avec soja.

After my companion was saved by my being properly fed and caffeinated, we felt it safe to venture out. We took a chilly but beautiful boat trip down the Seine and saw all the sights from the water.

We hopped off at Notre Dame and had a beautiful stroll around the most beautiful church. Good for the soul, though the tourists who wouldn’t be quiet and respect their request for silence really annoyed me. It really is a lovely church, and celebrating it’s 850 year anniversary this year.

On our way to the Louvre, we stopped at a very romantic and beautiful bridge covered in locks. The idea is that you go with your lover, write your names on the lock, lock it to the bridge and then throw the key in the river. Dan and I were both tempted to put up a friendship lock but decided it would be more special if we saved it for, you know, the one.

We got lost in the Louvre and saw the Mona Lisa, Venus de Milo, and many other treasures of antiquity. It’s really a masterpiece itself and was lovely to make a return visit.

After that, the Musée de l’orangerie to see a huge and beautiful Monet mural. That was nice, although I hardly felt welcome after my companion got in for free with his EU ID. Making the Canadian pay… Hardly hospitable.

We walked all through beautiful courtyards and down the Champs-Élysée where we had another lunch in the fashion of the first one. A quick view of the Arc de Triomophe (constructed for Napoleon but not completed before his death) and then the growing “snow storm” forced us home. (Snow storm is in quotation marks because I’m Canadian… I mean seriously).

We rested our legs, warmed up, and then headed back out into the night! I almost didn’t go, I almost couldn’t tear myself from the warm bed but luckily my friend Dan was there to encourage me. I’m glad he did because our efforts were rewarded.

The plan was to head up to the Basilique du Sacré-Cœur. The highest point in the city (trust me, I walked up the hill) with a view that can’t be beat. This was another thing I didn’t really do at night during my last visit. Winding through the back streets of quaint and old looking Paris was lovely enough in the evening. As we walked up toward the church we had to join a massive cue of parishioners with Candles singing beautiful French hymns. It’s very hard to translate from a song, especially a hymn, but I caught “I come to you lord Jesus”. They were carrying a wooden Mary, I think, all the way to the church. They stopped to sing a bit outside the church and then went in. It was absolutely magical, looking out over the city, sparkling below, with the breathtaking church, candle light and French hymns in the background. This is my second favourite memory from this trip…

Finally, a stroll through Monmartre, the nearby red light district. Which wasn’t that interesting; too cold for the girls to be outside I guess. We had dinner, another nice little restaurant, more wine, crêpes for dessert. A beautiful thing really. Even after assuring ourselves we’d have an early night, we crawled into bed after midnight, again!

Friday in Paris

So this weekend I went to Paris. I’ve been to Paris before but so had my travel buddy so it worked well. Friday was so busy! We got up at 4:30 in the morning so we could catch our train on time. After a bus, the tube (two lines) and the 2 hour twenty minute express train, we arrived in Paris at about 10:20 Paris local time.

First stop was Parc du Buttes Chaumont. Stretching our legs a bit in a beautiful park. The sun was out and it wasn’t even that cold (something that was soon to change).

After a lovely stroll, we headed to Père Lachaise, a beautiful cemetery. Dan wanted to see where Jim Morison was buried and I wanted to see Oscar Wilde. Unfortunately, they’ve blocked it off now so you can’t kiss his gravestone like people used to. Oh well.

As if the day hadn’t been creepy enough… We stopped at the catacombs of Paris because I was disappointed that I missed it the first time around. Here, however we had to wait outside for almost 45 minutes and this is when the weather turned on us. We got our first glimpse of Paris with a beautiful light snow falling all around.

The catacombs themselves were unbelievable. Actually the strangest thing I’ve ever seen- EVER. They are old lime quarries that, when unearthed by a giant cave in under the city, they decided to put to use. Thousands of bones from unconsecrated cemeteries were moved here. Stacked, almost artistically… An unbelievable sight, sad, that all these people, who had real lives, names, families, dreams and fears would be so nameless, stacked, economically… Though I guess their bones were treated with some sense of dignity, in that they were given a place to rest… I don’t know, now it is a tourist attraction; on this occasion, I’m terribly conflicted and that honestly makes this my favourite place we visited. Though, I must admit I was a little creeped out walking so close to so many bones, being dripped on from the ceiling and by the creepy long haired little girl who was standing with her face to a corner, singing and swaying, casting shadows in the low lamp light. That was the creepiest thing I’ve ever seen, legitimately, in my whole life. I got out of that section pretty quickly.

We stopped for tea at an amazing little bakery. My French skills actually came in handy. I had an entire conversation, albeit an awkward one, with a woman in the bakery! I also had my first macaroon. Yum.

Finally, after we checked into our hostel, very close to the Eiffel tower, we headed out into the bitter bitter cold to see it at night. I’d been up it before during the day but I’d never been to the top at night. That is definitely something I’d recommend. It was extremely windy though and I did get a little scared. The light snow in the sparkling lights of the tower was pretty magical though and totally worth it.

Last stop, beautiful dinner and French wine at a cute little restaurant. Yum. No earlier that 12 pm we got back to the hostel. A long day, but I think my favourite.

Sunday Funday

This photo is from the science museum where Google has sponsored this really cool exhibit. They have neat instruments that are controlled by people at home. This is a robot that takes your picture and then draws it in the sand. This isn’t me by the way.

So Sunday, the 17th of February was quite the day. It started off early in Southwark with an amazing Breakfast at the Table Cafe. Probably the most expensive breakfast I’ve ever eaten, although, I didn’t pay so does it still count? I had one if the best eggs Benedict I’ve ever had and good company. It is one of those restaurants where you sit communally with strangers. The couple we ended up sitting next to was a British primary school teacher and a Canadian man who was from Port Elgin. I think that’s how you spell it. It’s just about 2 hours from my home town in Canada. He asked were I was from and I said Canada. He asked more specifically, and I said Ontario…. Near Toronto… He said I was getting warmer so I took the chance and said Orangeville, as if it was a question. “Orangeville?” … “You probably haven’t heard of it, it’s small”… And he had of course. He told me all sorts of stories about Orangeville. The world seems so small some times. My poor date didn’t get too many words in after that lol.

After that we walked along the Thames towards central London and the sun was shining and there were loads of people out and about enjoying it. We sat in Trafalgar Square and soaked up some rays which was lovely. Finally we went to see the life of Pi in the theatre and that was a really beautiful movie. (Except for the scene with the jelly fish, that nearly killed me.)

The person I was with had to head home to get ready for a football game but I decided to hang around downtown since I was already there. The theatre was right by Piccadilly Circus. (Side note, the theatre is called the cinema, movies are films, and for the love of god, don’t say you are going to see a matinee.) I found out my housemate was downtown so I walked from Piccadilly Circus to Oxford street to meet him. We went to the science museum which was good fun and bought some delicious cookies from Ben’s… Our regular cookie spot in South Kensington.

I had a nice two hour Skype call with someone at home and then rounded the day off with a classic… Ducktales. Which I fell asleep during. Two busy days of walking around really took it out of me :).

General update

So it’s been busy since I got back from my holiday. I was definitely just going to let my blog fade into nothingness for lack of motivation. However, I am doing some fun things soon, and I’ve done a lot of fun stuff since I’ve been back so I suppose it would be worth trying to improve my discipline.

Since I’ve been back I started a new full time position that will probably take me until the end of the year. I’m working at another high school in kent but I really really like this one. The staff is very supportive and they treat me really well.

As far as things I’ve done and seen since I’ve been back… Let’s see if I can remember. I’ve been to the natural History museum and the V and A museum both with my housemate. I’ve been to Hyde park, regent park, and yesterday we went to Hamstead Heath park. We visited a graveyard yesterday that was very cool as well. The picture of the squirrel is from the park and all those graves crammed together is the graveyard. I’ve been to the Light show exhibit at Southbank which we nearly didn’t get into because it was sold out. It’s a pretty cool art exhibition focusing on art made with artificial light.

I’ve been to a few pubs, the cutty sark remaining my favorite because its beautiful, local, friendly, and the bar tenders are cute. We went to one club called Fabric that was really fun but expensive. I’ve also been to Gordon’s wine bar, as in Gordon Ramsay, and that was really nice.

What else? We’ve had a crazy snow storm that shut the transit down and stranded me in Kent. Though English people are really fun when it snows. They get so child like and fun. We’ve had a LOT of rain as well -.- though now it’s been warm and sunny for a few days.

I did have a bad fall… Well the fall really wasn’t all that bad, even ground, just a little slip. If you took a look at my legs now though you’d think I’d fallen down a flight of stairs. Rather embarrassing as it was in front of many of my students and I had to wash and dry my pants at school on the radiator while I stood there in my underwear. Sigh. I’m so clumsy.

Ok so, that’s the main update. My mom’s health is much better and I’m feeling pretty secure in my life right now so I think this is generally a positive update. I’ll try and update soon on my new job… I have a few stories already I could share and I definitely need to include a picture of my classroom – who paints a classroom lavender!?!? It’s half term now so I have a bit more time (between marking I need to catch up on and going to Paris). Hope this helps Trista 🙂 and anyone else keeping up 🙂

Pancake Tuesday

Pancake Tuesday in style at the request of my British housemate. He requested a stack of American style pancakes and my condition was the acquisition of real Canadian maple syrup. After some heat in the kitchen over whether my pancakes would be fluffy enough, the goal was achieved. And it was delicious.

Graves all around

Can you count all the graves. We went to a beautiful park today and stumbled upon this amazing cemetery. I don’t think they could have crammed more people into one spot. This photograph shows a less crowded but over grown part of the cemetery. Most famous person buried there that I knew-> the author George Elliot. Anyway. A lovely walk and the sun even came out for us today.